NOM BLOG

Category Archives: Children

National Organization for Marriage Expresses Gratitude for World Vision’s Reaffirmation of the Sanctity of Marriage

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: March 26, 2014
Contact: Elizabeth Ray or Matille Thebolt (703-683-5004)


"Today's reversal is cause for celebration and congratulation. World Vision has listened to their supporters and congregations worldwide and chosen to stand by the Christian truth of marriage in spite of what must be immense pressure from the radical same-sex 'marriage' lobby." — Brian Brown, NOM President —

nom_logo

Washington, D.C. — The National Organization for Marriage today expressed gratitude to World Vision's Leadership and Board for reaffirming the sanctity of marriage and the pivotal importance of marriage to Christian tradition and life.

"The Christian view of marriage clearly holds that it is the union of one man and one woman," said Brian Brown, NOM President. "It was for this reason that many were dismayed earlier this week by the news that World Vision was compromising its stance upon this Biblical value by a new policy that would recognize the validity of 'marriage' between same-sex persons. Today's reversal is cause for celebration and congratulation. World Vision has listened to their supporters and congregations worldwide and chosen to stand by the Christian truth of marriage in spite of what must be immense pressure from the radical same-sex 'marriage' lobby."

World Vision's website explains that the organization will "bear witness to the redemption offered only through faith in Jesus Christ. The staff we engage are equipped by belief and practice to bear this witness. We will maintain our identity as Christian while being sensitive to the diverse contexts in which we express that identity." Brown identified this as the crux of the tension that erupted earlier in the week.

"World Vision expects those it engages as staff to live by the Christian principles and teachings to which the organization was founded to bear witness," Brown explained. "This is why so many people were upset by the organization's proposal to begin hiring staff who had participated in same-sex 'marriages.' The truth of the Christian message is that love for all and respect for God's will in marriage are not exclusive propositions: they can, indeed they must, coincide. True love for all of God's children means recognizing and holding sacred God's plan for the human family."

The National Organization for Marriage is joining with Christian Union and The Manhattan Declaration in encouraging their supporters to visit http://www.facebook.com/WorldVisionStandingforMarriage and express appreciation for the Board's decision.

###

To schedule an interview with Brian Brown, President of the National Organization for Marriage, please contact Elizabeth Ray, [email protected], or Matille Thebolt, [email protected], at 703-683-5004

Paid for by The National Organization for Marriage, Brian Brown, president. 2029 K Street NW, Suite 300 Washington, DC 20006, not authorized by any candidate or candidate's committee. New § 68A.405(1)(f) & (h).

Utah's Court Filing on Marriage "All About Kids"

In The Salt Lake Tribune, Brooke Adams does a fairly good job presenting the essential arguments in the State of Utah's court filing in support of the marriage amendment which is under legal scrutiny by the 10th Circuit Court of Appeals.

The headline of the article is its weakest point, declaring "State makes it all about kids in brief against same-sex marriage." 

Baby_Wedding_RingsWe would say, rather, two things: (1) the State is recognizing that marriage is all about the kids, simply observing marriage as a given phenomenon and institution, preexisting any state -- whereas, on the other hand, it is the marriage redefinition side of the debate that seeks to "make" marriage about something which it is not; and (2) the brief should not therefore be said to be "against same-sex marriage," but instead to be for marriage --  marriage as it has come down to us through history and tradition.

Nevertheless, as we said at the outset, the article does do a rather fair job outlining the most salient points of the State's brief:

Utah has chosen a definition of marriage that is "principally a child-centered institution, one focused first and foremost on the welfare of children rather than the emotional interests of adults," the state said. "And by reinforcing that understanding, the state gently encourages parents to routinely sacrifice their own interests to the legitimate needs and interests of their children."

That definition is not designed to demean other family structures "any more than giving an ‘A’ to some students demeans others," the state said.

You should read the entire article, which has ample additional quotations from the filing.

What Makes a Parent? A Kansas Court Case Reveals How Far We've Fallen from the Ideal Answer

A terribly sad and maddening story out of Kansas today reveals just how absurdly astray the fruits of the sexual revolution have taken us with respect to understanding the nature of marriage and family.

The story involves a man named William Marotta, and reads like a script of a satire but is all too sadly real.

Here is the basic timeline of the situation, according to the coverage from CNN:

  • In 2009, a lesbian couple from Topeka, Kansas posted an ad on Craiglist(!) seeking a sperm donor.
  • Marotta (who is married!) responded and "donated [his] genetic material" to the women free of charge.
  • The couple then performed an artificial insemination procedure at home(!) and one of the women conceived and gave birth to a baby girl.
  • Now - with the child only 4 years old - the couple have separated and one of the women has had to quit work citing medical reasons.
  • The state, therefore, is stepping in and ordering Marotta to pay child support for the four-year old girl.
  • Marotta is protesting this order in court, saying of the little girl, "I'm not her parent."

Young GirlReading the story, it is particularly horrifying that the child's interests and roles aren't given primary attention, or really any attention at all. Her rights, her needs, her future are all merely the "frame" of the story, relegated to being treated as nothing more than a source of inconvenience in the lives of these three adults.

The relevance of this story to the issue of same-sex 'marriage' is obvious: The drive to redefine marriage is born of a culture which makes marriage and parenting about the desires of adults rather than the rights and welfare of children. This story gives a snapshot of that culture.

For these three adults, having a child wasn't the serious and heavily weighed decision of commitment that it should be. Marotta himself says he responded to the Craigslist ad  (and let's pause momentarily again over that detail) because he was "intrigued" - fathering a daughter was a lark for him. And as for the couple who so quickly separated... one can only wonder whether they were truly prepared for the gravity of parenthood, when part of the process involved soliciting sperm from a random stranger met on the internet!

This is why marriage matters: Marriage encapsulates a set of norms and expectations which civilize men, protect women, and serve the needs of children. Abandon these norms, and "parenting" becomes a soap-opera story about adults' goals and achievements, where children are merely part of the supporting cast.

Pro-Marriage Rally Planned at Utah State Capitol

Check it out!

Stand for Marriage Flyer


Click here to read a news piece on the planned rally.

If you live in Utah, I hope to see you there! If not, please share this with your pro-marriage family and friends in Utah so that we can have a strong showing and demonstrate in a resounding way that Utah stands for marriage!

 

"Doctors Can't Be Essential, Because Some Doctors Are Bad"

... said no sick person, ever.

And yet this seems to have been the model of an implied argument from a pro-same-sex 'marriage' legislator in Indiana during an exchange that occurred earlier this week in the House Judiciary Committee's hearing on HJR3, the proposed Indiana marriage amendment.

Father and DaughterDuring testimony from Alliance Defending Freedom attorney Kellie Fiedorek (and she did a wonderful job, by the way!), there occurred the following exchange (as reported by in a stilted article by The Raw Story). The emphasis is ours editorially:

“The only relationship that can naturally produce children is that between a man and a woman,” Fiedorek noted. “There are situations where they may not want to have children, maybe they cannot have children. But the union of one man and one woman still furthers the ideal that children, when that happens, will be born into homes with a mom and a dad.”

“You know, I had a mom and a dad and I wish my dad wasn’t there, the way he acted in my household,” [Democratic State Rep. Vernon Smith] pointed out.

This is unfortunately a frequent error in logic that arises in the marriage debate. When marriage advocates point out the unique contributions and value that men and women bring to the enterprise of marriage - and particularly the irreplaceable role of fathers (a fact observed by, among others, President Obama himself) - proponents of redefining marriage will often fall back on the failures of some fathers to try to call into question the ideal.

But reasoning from the failure of an ideal that the ideal is somehow less important is a flawed line of reasoning in any case:

  • Do occasional bad doctors mean we should get rid of doctors?
  • Does a failed inner-city charity mean we should abolish all inner-city charities?
  • Does the existence of asthma mean breathing is bad?

It is important, therefore, to note that a legislator who would deprive Indiana voters of their right to vote to protect marriage and to reaffirm the crucial role fathers play in children's lives is employing such a logical fallacy as this one.

There will always be exceptions to the general rule. Some children seemingly do fine even in extremely unstable family environments with only one parent, or even no parents involved in their lives. But as a rule, the evidence is overwhelming that children thrive best when raised in a stable, intact family with a mother and a father. That is what we should encourage and promote.

And this is why Indiana voters must redouble their efforts to contact their legislators and urge them to put this issue to the test of the common sense and wisdom Indiana's ordinary citizens who know better than to abandon the only institution that binds men and women to each other for the benefit of the couple, any children born of their union, and society as a whole.

Given the opportunity to vote, we are confident that the people of Indiana will preserve marriage, not abandon it!

Will the American People Make 2014 the Turning Point for Marriage

The Daily Caller published NOM president Brian Brown’s end-of-the-year Op-ed, where he discusses how pivotal 2014 will be for marriage.  Brown writes:

Marriage in 2014The American people know how important marriage is to the country, and to families. We’re fed up with the elite telling us marriage must be abandoned in the name of “equality.” America needs men and women to come together, produce children, and raise those children with the love and support of both a mother and a father. That’s what marriage does, and that is profoundly good for the country.

Looking back at what the courts did in 2013, and could do again in 2014 to undermine marriage, Brian makes it clear that the only way to protect marriage from activist justices is to amend the U.S. Constitution.  He continues:

Regardless of what the Court does, the survival of marriage as the nation has always known it may well depend on whether the American people can again be roused to take action. They’d need to do more than sign a petition — they’d need to demand that their political leaders amend the US constitution to preserve marriage.

There is, of course, already a federal Marriage Protection Amendment, authored by Rep. Tim Huelskamp of Kansas, working its way through Congress. If you haven't taken action to urge your legislators to enact this important law, please do so right away!

G.K. Chesterton wrote, “The greatest political storm flutters only a fringe of humanity. But an ordinary man and an ordinary woman and their ordinary children literally alter the destiny of nations.”

In 2014, ordinary men and women across this country will need to step up and demand that their political leaders amend the Constitution to preserve marriage.  And when they do, they will alter the destiny of this nation.

 

Another Polygamy Reality Show? Just What We Need...

From articles praising polygamous unions in the media to teaching elementary school children about "happy triples," it's become clear that new, more extreme steps are being taken to normalize the practice of polygamy and further promote the redefinition of marriage.

The latest example is a new reality show that's been picked up by TLC detailing the lives of a Utah polygamist with five wives and twenty-four children.

In addition to the Browns and now the Williams family, TLC also has done a special featuring the Darger family of Utah. HBO's fictional show about a polygamous family, 'Big Love,' ran for five seasons.

Following the recent court ruling, Williams said now is the time for polygamists to show they are deserving of the recognition by putting an end to the misogyny rampant among the culture and putting women on equal footing as men.

'Women are not a commodity and they shouldn't be treated as such,' said Williams, 43, a project manager in his brother's construction business. 'There needs to be complete symmetry within a marriage.' -Mail Online

GLAAD's "Only Wish": To Deny Children the Right to a Mother and a Father

Every child deserves the love of both a mother and a father. Kids know that moms and dads are special and unique, that they can each bring to a child's life a vital contribution that is irreplaceable and invaluable. Many adults who have grown up, for whatever reason, without either a mom or a dad have expressed the wish that this hadn't been so, which by no means devalues the heroic sacrifices and honorable efforts of single parents: it simply testifies to the importance both moms and dads play in children's lives. The best mom cannot make a dad. Ten dads can't equal one mom.

GLADD's Only WishThis is why it is troubling that, this holiday season, the gay activist organization GLAAD is expressing its "Only Wish" as creating a new normal where children will be deprived of the love of either a father or a mother on a regular basis, and indeed that this situation will be rewarded and incentivized by the government.\

The campaign is reported by The Huffington Post's "Gay Voices" blog:

Leading lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) advocacy organization GLAAD is spearheading a new holiday initiative to put pressure on states that have yet to legalize gay marriage -- and you can help!

With 34 U.S. states left on the road to marriage equality for same-sex couples, GLAAD is encouraging LGBT families and allies through their "Only Wish" campaign to send holiday cards to these individual governors that encourage them to support marriage rights for members of the LGBT community.

The warm and fuzzy presentation elides the essential truth that when we talk about redefining marriage, we're talking about denying kids' rights to both a mother and a father.

A commentor on the article was not fooled, though, and nailed the point succinctly:

A loving and compassionate society never purposefully creates motherless or fatherless families. Sadly, this campaign is neither loving nor compassionate.

For our part, we'll wish that folks continue waking up to the devastating reality of what a disservice redefining marriage does to men, women, and children, and to society as a whole.

"A dating site that cuts straight to the divorce"

That's how David Wright of ABC News describes Modamily - a site dedicated to " provid[ing] a network where members can meet other like-minded people who dream of becoming a parent. There are many ways to become a parent, and what Modamily does is help our members find someone that wants to raise a child in a similar fashion as they do."

Disconnecting Parents and ChildMore than 5,000 people have signed up on L.A.-based Modamily. Other co-parenting websites claim similar numbers, including a growing number of sites serving gays and lesbians in committed relationships who are now interested in having children.

[The HTML "title tags" used by the site - the terms that appear at the top of the browser window and also register hits with search engines - include the phrases "baby daddy" and "single want baby."]

Wright reports on Modamily for Yahoo!News, focusing on a woman named Hope who "is one of a growing number of Americans interested in exploding the old 1950s notion of the nuclear family. She's not looking for love. She wants a co-parent."

Hope already has two children, each by separate fathers, Wright explains; and now she is "shopping" online for a third mate.

Wright reveals that not everyone is crazy about the new idea of family:

Dr. Robert Fellmeth, executive director of the Children's Advocacy Institute, said there's a reason for doing things the old-fashioned way.

"I'm a 19th century romantic in saying that there is an advantage in at least trying to have the relationship between the parent[s] that's deep and meaningful and goes beyond simply the mutual desire to have a child," he said.

"The child benefits from having two parents who love each other, who are willing to sacrifice for each other," he said. "If it fails, it fails, but at least try!"

You can read or watch Wright's report here.

Citizens of the Republic of Croatia Vote to Preserve Marriage

As reported by Reuters [emphasis added]:

Dubrovnik, CroatiaCroats voted overwhelmingly in favour of defining marriage in the constitution as a "union of man and woman" on Sunday, a move initiated by Roman Catholic groups but criticised by opponents as discrimination against homosexuals.

Almost 66 percent of those who voted in the referendum in the new European Union member [nation] endorsed the initiative, launched by the Catholic group "In the Name of the Family", according to preliminary results on Sunday night....

Despite the usual cries from the left that this vote evinces an animus against gay and lesbian persons, the reasoning for those supporting the initiative is the same common-sense value system that has led to marriage victories in so many states here in America:

Ballet dancer Sanja Grgic said: "I have nothing against gay people, I have many gay friends, but I voted in favour because I think children should grow up in a family that has a mother and a father."

Read the rest of the report here.

"Privacy for All Students" Campaign Submits Record Number of Signatures

From the Christian Post:

Privacy for All StudentsPrivacy For All Students (PFAS), a grassroots organization founded in 2011, announced Sunday that they hit the 620,000 signature mark, which is well above the minimum needed for an initiative to get on the ballot.

Karen England, member of the PFAS coalition's executive committee, said in a statement that she believed the number might be the largest amount of signatories garnered for any California ballot initiative.

"As far as we are aware, this is the largest number of volunteer signatures ever submitted in a California referendum campaign," said England.

You can read more of the article here.

Or, to find out more about the Privacy for All Students campaign, visit their website.

"Privacy for All Students" Effort Continues to Gain Steam

PFAS

We've been keeping our readers informed about the ongoing efforts in California to overturn AB 1266, the "Co-ed Bathroom Law" - efforts which have brought together a broad coalition effort in the Privacy for All Students campaign, including NOM California and NOM's political consultant Frank Schubert.

In case you missed it, Frank was interviewed last Friday for National Review Online and explained to Alec Torres why he is optimistic about the initiative underway there:

Once people become aware of [the law], then they oppose it.... We’ve done a survey and what we’ve found is that only 35 percent of voters support this law, and 51 percent oppose it. When you [talk with individuals and] go through the pro and con arguments, we end up at over 60 percent opposition to the law.

A victorious repeal of the law is almost certain if the matter can be put on the ballot. That's what the Privacy for All Students coalition is busy working to do, gathering petition signatures to meet a November 8th deadline.

To find out how you can help, visit the coalition's website today.

Sometimes There's Only One Right Word

The French writer Gustave Flaubert famously spent weeks sometimes pondering a single word looking for just the right one - what he called "le mot juste."

flaubert

Flaubert recognized that sometimes there really is only one perfect term to describe the essence of a particular thing. Well, there is one perfect word to describe our culture's dissonant approach to marriage and family, and that word is incoherent.

An article in yesterday's Washington Times reports that there is a growing concern about "irresponsible fatherhood" in our society: "Despite myriad efforts by fatherhood programs, too many men are ending up in multiple relationships, with multiple children from multiple mothers."

An expert quoted in the article suggests that men need to "advised... to 'slow down,' 'prepare for fatherhood,' realize that a mother and child are 'a package' and 'take time' to select a loving partner and future mother."

Erasing the First Amendment

But these efforts to address a very real concern are incoherent in a cultural context where powerful forces are pushing a radical agenda to redefine marriage and thereby necessarily redefine the roles of parents, making 'fatherhood' an expendable option and devaluing the unique services that men and women each provide in raising children.

To preserve and promote fatherhood requires first that we preserve and promote the true definition of marriage. Marriage is like a key-word for a cipher which, when you get it wrong, causes all the connected code-words to fall apart too. Fatherhood depends on the meaning of the unique and special union of one man and one woman.  And for that union, le mot juste is "marriage."

"As Close to an Ideal Test as We've Seen"

Over at Public Discourse, Professor Mark Regnerus reports on the important new study from Canada which we told you about yesterday.

Regnerus shares his opinions on the research by Douglas Allen published in the Review of the Economics of the Household last week:

FamilyEvery study has its limitations, and this one does too.... [but] its limitations are modest in comparison to its remarkable and unique strengths—a rigorous and thorough analysis of a massive, nationally-representative dataset from a country whose government has long affirmed same-sex couples and parenting. It is as close to an ideal test as we’ve seen yet.

The study’s publication continues the emergence of new, population-based research in this domain, much of which has undermined scholarly and popular claims about equivalence between same-sex and opposite-sex households echoed by activists and reflected in recent legal proceedings about same-sex marriage.

Read Professor Regnerus' full piece here.

Facts Are Stubborn Things

The famous line from founding father John Adams comes to mind with the publication of yet another study - published in a peer reviewed academic journal - that demonstrates the negative outcomes for children when they are denied the love of either a mother or a father. Maggie Gallagher reports on the study over at NRO:

Just-the-FactsUsing Canadian census data, a very large and therefore representative database, Canadian professor Douglas Allen of Simon Frazier University finds that children raised by intact, married biological parents do better than children raised by same-sex couples.

So once again science confirms the truth about the importance of marriage that the wisdom of the ages and common sense have always told us: marriage matters because kids need and deserve a mom and a dad. Redefining marriage, though, means that kids as a norm will be denied at least one of these parents' vital role in their lives - and there are consequences, whether we like it or not. Facts are stubborn things.