Jim Daly: "Why the Same-Sex Marriage Experiment Will Not Work"


The gay blogosphere has been trying to claim that Jim Daly of Focus on the Family has given up on protecting marriage. Today he makes clear he hasn't, and knows why:

... I’ve been following the ongoing marriage debate in the New York state legislature. Governor Andrew Cuomo has declared the legalization of same-sex marriage his number one priority. Supporters are waging a clever, celebrity-driven and well-funded campaign, suggesting that all they want is “marriage equality.” In fact, what they want to do is redefine this multi-millennial institution.

... In each example of social reengineering I’ve noted [no-fault divorce, cohabitation, etc], progressives promised good things. Sadly, the exact opposite has happened. However well-meaning the motivation, reengineering what God has designed is not only unwise, but radical and dangerous, too.

Without evidence of success to which to point, supporters of these ill-fated ventures are left with but one choice: If you can’t change unfavorable outcomes, you change the minds of people as to what is considered favorable and good.

Here lies the last great frontier and the last gasp for those determined to re-engineer marriage. Those committed to this form of radicalism have systematically broken down the cultural barrier to same sex marriage by desensitizing people on the issue, stigmatizing those who oppose the movement and potentially criminalizing anyone who stands in opposition to them. The irony in our cultural discussion currently, is if you support traditional marriage, you are the one perceived by the cultural elite to be the radical.


  1. SC Guy
    Posted May 24, 2011 at 4:22 pm | Permalink

    I figured they were taking him out of context somehow. That said, we conservatives must be guarded in what we say and WE MUST NEVER GIVE UP. Surrender is never an option, regardless of what some unreliable opinion polls say - polls that answer to no one and are not certifiably accurate by any guiding process or anything. I mean, how do we even know if they're not biased? There's no way of verifying it.
    If we took the defeatist approach, you can be sure that Maryland and Rhode Island would have adopted full-tilt gay marriage this year.

  2. SC Guy
    Posted May 24, 2011 at 4:28 pm | Permalink

    Speaking of the polls, you will find it interesting that a poll by Dem firm PPP (Public Policy Polling) found that Washington State voters are evenly splite over the issue 46%-44%. Considering that Washington leans considerably more to the left than the national average, how is it possible that 53% of Americans oppose gay marriage if Washingtonians are evenly split? The simple answer is they can't.

  3. Ken
    Posted May 24, 2011 at 4:44 pm | Permalink

    Stop talking about people's families as "experiments". It's offensive.

  4. Jackson
    Posted May 24, 2011 at 6:04 pm | Permalink

    Out of context? Read his actual words:

  5. alvin m.
    Posted May 24, 2011 at 6:11 pm | Permalink

    I agree with Jackson. READ his words.

  6. Mike Brooks
    Posted May 24, 2011 at 6:15 pm | Permalink

    SC -

    I think the difference is "voters" versus "Americans." I wonder what the lower age range of the PPP poll is. It might be true that a lot of kids under 18 years old are in favor of SSM, but it's irrelevant in practice. That's one of the reasons why we have a minimum voting age (and why some liberals are pushing to lower it)

  7. edgewaterprog
    Posted May 24, 2011 at 7:20 pm | Permalink

    His statement in World magazine seems clear to me.

  8. dunkie10
    Posted May 24, 2011 at 8:12 pm | Permalink

    We're winning the younger generation on abortion, at least in theory. What about same-sex marriage? We're losing on that one, especially among the 20- and 30-somethings: 65 to 70 percent of them favor same-sex marriage. I don't know if that's going to change with a little more age—demographers would say probably not. We've probably lost that. I don't want to be extremist here, but I think we need to start calculating where we are in the culture.


    What's the current perception of gay activists about Christian marriage? I sat down with one. He said, "You guys haven't done so well with marriage. Why are you upset about us having a try?" We've got to look at our own house, make sure that our marriages are healthy, that we're being a good witness to the world. Then we can continue to work on defending marriage as best as we can."

    So, an honest admission from FOTF. Would that NOM would understand this, and their members would (if they could)!

  9. Andrew
    Posted May 24, 2011 at 8:30 pm | Permalink

    Dunkie, I respect your view, but I think you're all wrong on this. The reason why polling numbers are so great for SSM is the lack of honest debate in the media. Over and over the media trumpets their bias and then smothers the other side of the argument. The truth comes out when there is an opportunity to vote on it. As soon as people hear the real arguments, it changes the debate completely. That is why there's such a disparity between opinion polls and voting booths.

    Everyone is so afraid to have an opinion other than what the media touts for fear of being labeled as a hateful bigot or some other such nonsense that free healthy debate can't be had until the issues are forced to the forefront by an election.

    This isn't over by far, and the scorecard definitely reflects that. Don't be so quick to throw in the towel on marriage just yet.

  10. Marion
    Posted May 24, 2011 at 8:48 pm | Permalink

    SSM and abortion are wildly different issues, but the 'christian' right is incapable of viewing the world with a modicum of nuance -- it's 'them or us', 'our selective and ever-changing interpretation of the bible vs anyone who wants to challenge it'. Like stoning, witch-burning, women's rights, slavery and anti-miscegenation laws, some bible-based bigotries don't survive the evolution of society. SSM marriage will go the same way and become the law of the land at some point soon. On the other hand, abortion will remain contentious forever more.

  11. L. Marie
    Posted May 24, 2011 at 10:28 pm | Permalink

    "Stop talking about people's families as "experiments". It's offensive."

    I'd rather risk offending you than send the message to kids that their mom and dad don't matter.

  12. John Noe
    Posted May 26, 2011 at 1:07 am | Permalink

    Dunkie: Do not give up so quickly. Let us face it. We were caught napping. We did not see the threat to marriage and what the homosexual activists would do. Now we do. For the first time there is an organized opposition that is making great points to the public. We can reach the young as soon as they get out of school.
    The biggest thing you are forgetting is people like me. When I was younger, I too was a looney liberal and leaned left. As I got older and got a real education in the real world things changed.
    As far as these young voters are. They get older and can be reasoned with. The glass is more than half full not empty.

  13. BK
    Posted June 2, 2011 at 5:08 am | Permalink

    Loving couples having the ability to marry one another is probably the biggest threat to marriage our country has ever faced.

  14. C. Vegas
    Posted June 4, 2011 at 10:14 pm | Permalink


    The "1 in 2 marriages end in divorce" statistic is also misleading. People who end their first marriage are much more likely to get married and divorced multiple times. The percentage of second marriages that end in divorce is higher than the percentage of first marriages. These serial marriages skew the statistic upwards.

    The argument that the institution of marriage and family is already screwed up, so we should screw it up either further by redefining it to same sex partners and multiple partners (polygamy) and encourage same sex partners to adopt or use surrogacy to obtain a poor argument. All of these are experiments in familial structure.

    At will divorce laws have unquestionably screwed our entire society up and had horrific consequences on children. I am a child of divorce myself and can testify to how damaging divorce is. There are plenty of people out there who would support making divorce more difficult. It is easier to get divorced than it is to break the mortgage contract on your house. That is entirely wrong.

    Purposefully denying a child a mother and a father is equally wrong whether parents are doing it through divorce, same sex partners are doing it through surrogacy, or women are choosing single motherhood.

    I heartily recommend the book The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce: The 25 Year Landmark Study. Divorce was another social experiment that has already had terrible effects on our society.

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